Big Brother
by the.stories.live.on
Summary: Sai is a go prodigy, but he dies at the age of 20, just after winning the Hon'inbo Tournament, leaving his 3 year old brother, Hikaru behind. But Hikaru finds that his brother has attatched himself to his go board in order to stay by Hikaru's side.
1. Chapter 1

Needless to say, most of this does not belong to me; it belongs to Yumi Hotta. I'm just borrowing for a bit.

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He was sitting at his brother's goban working on the life or death problems his brother had left him, when his mother came into the room to tell him Sai was never coming home.

Hikaru looked up at his mother in confusion. "Why?" he asked. "Is Nii-san mad at us?"

"No." she said. She explained to him that Sai had gone to play the final game in the Hon'inbo Tournament. He had won the game, and won the title, but on the way home he was hit by a drunk driver. "He died on the way to the hospital." She didn't tell him that the only thing Sai had said on the way there was 'Hikaru.'

"He went to play go?"

"Yes." His mother confirmed.

"And he died?" he asked.

"Yes." She said, tears streaming down her face, ruining her usually immaculate makeup.

"So he died because of go." He said softly staring down at the board in front of him.

"Well, no." his mother began, but Hikaru was no longer listening. He cleaned up the stones and put the board away. His parents never saw the goban after that, and as far as they knew, Hikaru never touched it again.

Hikaru, who had always been an energetic child, a child who would always run instead of walk, withdrew into himself. He no longer played outside with the other children. For the most part he sat in his room looking into space.

His parents became very concerned, at the severe change his brother's death had had on him. They tried asking him what was wring but he always responded saying "Nothing."

They knew the brothers had been close, no matter that Sai had been 17 when his little brother was born. And besides, Sai had been around Hikaru more than anyone, including their parents, who traveled a great deal due to their father's job, and Hikaru was left with Sai most of the time. Sai adored his little brother and Hikaru returned the feelings. Sai spent as much time as he could with Hikaru, playing with him, teaching him go. He was twenty when he was killed, leaving the three year old Hikaru practically by himself.

His father took some time off from his work so that he and his wife would be able to stay with their younger son and help him through the crisis. But neither of them seemed to know how to comfort their little boy.

Hikaru began to have nightmares. They were made all the worse by the fact that Sai had always been there to comfort him before, and now there was no one. He didn't want to run to his parents, because he felt he didn't know them well enough to trust them.

One night his nightmares were particularly bad. He was lost, wandering through a maze of black and white stones. Stones were crashing down around him, placed by invisible hands. As he ran from the falling stones, he heard a murmuring begin, and it gradually grew louder and louder, becoming shouting, penetrating his skull, until the little boy was running with his hands over his ears. He tripped, and watched in terror as an enormous black stone crashed perilously close to him.

Suddenly his mind and body were filled with calm. The noise hadn't ceased, but it no longer bothered him. He heard his brother's voice quietly in his mind.

"_Remember what I've told you; you have to make life. You have to find a way. That is the only way to survive the game_."

Then he was no longer in the game, but above it, looking down at the board. He saw the intricate patterns, the battles between the black and white, darkness and light. The three year old boy gazed intently at the board, desperately searching for a way to make life. He saw it. Excitedly he grabbed a stone and smacked it down in the correct spot. And then he looked up, to see his brother's smiling face.

"_You know what you have to do to see me again, don't you_."

And Hikaru smiled, closing his eyes.

The first thing he did in the morning was rummage under his bed, and pull out his brother's goban. As he gently wiped off the dust, he saw drops of water falling on the board, and was surprised to find that he was crying. As he scrubbed his face with his sleeve, to get rid of the tears, he felt something akin to a breeze on top of his head. He looked up to see the person he wanted to see most in the whole world sitting across from him, leaning slightly forward so as to rest his hand on Hikaru's head.

"_Hikaru_." Sai said softly but happily with his familiar grin on his face.

"Nii-san." the little boy said, as he felt the tears falling once again.


	2. Chapter 2

Hikaru had made the mistake of mentioning Sai to his mother once. She became slightly worried at the apparent obsession he had with his dead brother, but then Sai told him sadly that he probably shouldn't mention him to his parents, he stopped, and his mother eventually forgot the incident.

"Nii-san," Hikaru asked on night after having just been tucked in bed by his mom. "Why can't I tell 'kaa-san and 'tou-san about you?"

_Oh, Hikaru, _Sai said. _It would make them sad._

"Do they not like you anymore?" Hikaru asked worriedly.

_It's not that, _Sai said sadly. _They think I'm gone, and to know I am here, but that they can't see me, or hear me, well, _he drifted off.

"Don't cry, Sai. If you don't want me to tell, I won't." Sai sniffled, overcome momentarily by sadness.

"G'night, nii-san," the little boy murmured drowsily. The ghost dried his tears and looked lovingly at the tiny body cuddled under the blankets.

_Good night, Hikaru._

Akari was perhaps the greatest blessing Sai and Hikaru found. She had stuck staunchly by Hikaru's side durind his depression. Perhaps it was her age, but when Hikaru told her about Sai, she believed him, and somehow understood. Sai had returned about a week earlier when Akari confronted Hikaru. She had been worried, in her own childish way when Hikaru had seemed so lost after Sai's death, but when he was suddenly happ again, and back to his old self, she was confused.

"Hikaru," she said one day. "Don't you miss Sai-nii?"

"Not really," he said carelessly. "I see him every day."

"But," she said confused. "But he died," she finished in a quiet voice.

"Oh, he did," said Hikaru.

"Then how can you see him?"

"We're not sure."

"Can I see him?" she asked excitedly. Akari had always like Sai and his playful but gentle personality. Hikaru looked like he was listening to someone, and his face fell. "No," he said sadly. "You can't."

Akari's expression mirrored Hikaru's, and he desperately searched for something to appease his friend. Suddenly a grin broke out on his face.

"But nii-san says you can talk to him through me."

"How?"

"You tell me what you want to say, and I'll tell you what _he_ wants to say."

Akari hesitated for a moment, then said, "Are you sure that will work?"

"Nii-san says it will, and I trust him."

"Okay." She tried to think of something to say, but only one thing came to mind, and it was terribly rude. But she had to say something, and finally she burst out, "What's it like being dead?" She covered her mouth, shocked at her own rudeness.

"Well," Hikaru put his hands behind his head. "He can't really touch anything except for me, and I'm the only one who can see him."

"Why are you the only one who gets to see him?"

Once again Hikaru seemed to be listening to someone she couldn't see, when suddenly, he snorted. "Nii-san says it's because I need him." Grinning, he heaned close to her and whispered conspiratorially, "I think he came back 'cause he wants to play go."

Secretly Akari agreed with Sai-nii, but aloud she said, "Go?"

"You know, that game he always played. He even made money playing it. Hey!" he said excitedly. "Wanna play? Nii-san's been teaching me." Without waiting for an answer, he dove beneath his bed.

"O, okay," Akari stammered, surprised at his sudden disappearance, and watched as he wriggled out backwards from under the bed, dragging something large and wooden. He pulled it to the center of the room and set it in front of Akari. He immediately dove beneath the bed and returned with two bowls filled with stones. He settled across from her and jumped straight into the basics. Id didn't make a whole lot of sense, but Hikaru was happy, so she was too.


End file.
